Kisetsu
by ravenna
Summary: Seasons change along with hearts. Over the course of one year, Ashitaka and San fall apart and come together again.
1. Winter I

Disclaimer_: Princess Mononoke_ is a creation of Studio Ghibli and the genius of Hayao Miyazaki. I claim no legal rights over his characters, storyline, settings, etc. Anyways, Miyazaki would probably faint if he knew how many times I'm watching his movie to write this damn fic.

**Kisetsu**

_Chapter One: Mono no Aware_

Winter in the mountains brought gusts of bitter winds that swept out the stale air of fall. The first snowfall veiled the forest in a fine layer of powdery, white lace. As if heralded by the northern winds, a deep quiet crept upon the land.

The people of Iron Town, always wary of the unknown, stayed safely within the walls of their city each winter. The biting cold and eerie silence of the woods were more than enough to keep them near the hearths of their noisy town. What was left of the iron-mining industry had stopped for the winter, and the townspeople kept their distance from the forest. Few dared to break the tranquility of the empty woods. However, there was one who kept close to the forest at all times.

At the edge of the woods near the lower end of the valley, gray smoke curled from the chimney of a small cabin. It's thatched walls and wooden beams groaned and creaked with the passing winds.

Outside, on the porch, Ashitaka sat watching the snow fall and thinking about San.

Unlike the other seasons, winter held no daily routines for Ashitaka. During the spring, summer, and fall, his days were mostly comprised of coaxing the plants to grow on his humble plot of land. But without seeds to plant, soil to till, or harvests to gather, Ashitaka fell into a habit of brooding during the winter.

He shifted, rustling the furs he had wrapped around himself, as he set down his chilled tea. Then he stared wistfully into dark line of trees where the forest began.

As a child, Ashitaka had loved the hush of winter. To him, winter was a time of peace when everyone fell into sluggish withdrawal from their troubles. His memories during his winters were the brightest: Kaya's cheeks, flushed from the cold, Yakkul's steamy breath rising in the chilled morning air, the wise women's wizened face shadowed by the fire as she told hundred-year old stories to the enraptured children around her. But what he remembered mostly and most fondly was how he would wander for miles, just to feel the muted crunch of his feet upon the snow.

Ashitaka hadn't walked through the forest since the first frost came, and he woke to find San on his doorstep, ready to say goodbye.

He had thought he would get used to her winter leaves. However, each time, for the past three years, nothing saddened him as much as the mornings when San came to his house, the only times when she ever approached his home.

It had been one week since a she had left. Ashitaka burrowed his nose deeper into the furs he had wrapped around himself. San had given them to him. The lingering traces of her scent comforted him.

"Here," San had said, without any formality, tossing him the furs. "You'll need these. It'll be colder than usual this winter."

"How do you know?" he had asked, stroking the soft pelts.

San had stared off into the mountains. There had been a distant look in her eyes. Ashitaka could almost see her shedding all the humanity he had worked so hard to build.

"I can smell it."

He hadn't questioned her. He didn't want to waste anymore words unless he was holding her and pleading for her not to go. But even those words would have been futile. There had been nothing he could have done to make her stay.

Ashitaka knew that every winter San's brothers returned from their distant territories and urged her, with yips and high howls, to join them as a pack once more. Their arrivals brought a feral gleam into her eyes along with a cold, standoffish demeanor. During the winters, she once again became more wolf than human.

The first year San had left, Ashitaka, careful not to pry, had asked her why she felt so compelled to join her brothers. Any other time, she loathed to leave her beloved woods; however, when her brothers came, she became restless.

"It's simpler," San had tried to explain, struggling for the words. "Being a wolf. Everything feels… less complicated. It's easier to be happy." She had pleaded with her eyes for him to understand.

Ashitaka tried, but it had hurt, knowing that it was easier to be happier without him.

Their last morning together, he had grasped her by the shoulders, ignoring the way her body tensed, and had searched her eyes. They were the same blue eyes he loved so dearly, yet he could see the warmth bleeding out of them. He had cupped her cheek in one hand, his tanned skin dark against the pale milk of hers. Careful not to smudge the streaks of paint on her face, dark blue for the winter, he had planted a kiss on her cheek. Then Ashitaka had pressed her close to him in a fierce embrace. After a few stuttering moments, he had felt her relax into his touch. Her fingers had curled into the fabric of his shirt as she hugged back. Burrowing his face into her neck, he had smelled wolves, and moss, and earth, and everything he loved best in the world because it was _San_ who meant everything to him.

"I'll miss you," he had murmured into her ear. "Come back safe to me, alright?"

They had separated, though Ashitaka had still held her loosely in the ring of his arms. San had smiled at him, a quick, beaming smile that had spoken more than words, and some of the warmth had crept back into her eyes. Then she left, the fangs on her necklace clattering sharply in the thin air, to where her brothers waited for her at the edge of the woods. She mounted one of them, spared him one last look, and they had darted into the thick screen of trees. A brief moment and she was gone.

Seven days seemed a lifetime now to Ashitaka. He wondered, as he did every winter, how he had survived San's absence. With the girl a constant fixation in his mind, time seemed to be moving as slowly as the ice floes trapped in the frozen mountain streams.

The snowfall began to grow heavier under Ashitaka's steady gaze. By morning, he knew that the trees would be glazed in snow and the silence of the woods would be impenetrable.

He sighed and pushed himself onto his feet. Stretching, the crack of his joints rang out like gunshots in the still air. Gathering his pelts and tea, he returned to the warm sanctuary of his cabin.

Once, winter had been his favorite time of the year. Now, every morning, Ashitaka willed the frost to melt more quickly. He wanted, more than anything else, for San to come home with her smile that warmed him like the spring sun.


	2. Winter II

**Author's Note:** It's been quite a while since my last update. Sorry about that. However, I'm thrilled that I got reviews! Ah, a writer's sweet sustenance. I also got a beta, Danyu, so many cookies to her for being ever so patient even when it seemed like I was dead.

**Kisetsu **

_Chapter Two: The Proposal_

The veins of frost that bled across the window scattered the sunlight into a thousand pinpricks of color. They danced along the column of Ashitaka's throat and gradually, as the morning eclipsed into noon, they touched his face, kissing the lids of his eyes open.

Ashitaka slowly resurfaced into consciousness and fought desperately to immerse himself back into his dreams. It was a futile swim against the current. He eventually cracked open a bleary eye, which was shut immediately with a wince as it met the sharp, stinging rays of the sun.

With a groan, he shifted and burrowed deeper into the tight cocoon of blankets. His internal clock sharply protested that it was already midday. However, the warm lure of his bed promptly vetoed his higher sensibilities. After all, there was nothing of interest to rouse him. Just another quiet winter day.

A sharp rapping issued from the front door.

Ashitaka shot out of bed, hissing between gritted teeth as his bare feet met the icy floor. They were numb by the time he reached his clothes chest at the far corner of the room. Reaching in blindly, he fished out the first thing his groping fingers snagged and pulled it over his head. It took a few moments of bleary-eyed blinking for him to register that he was wearing pants on his head instead of a shirt. Growling, he fought to untangle himself.

The knocking intensified.

As Ashitaka dressed, the reasonable part of his mind groggily reminded him that San never knocked. However, he couldn't quite manage to quell the small bubble of hope that had surfaced.

Smoothing down his tousled hair, Ashitaka double-checked to make sure he was decently attired. Then he ran to his front door and flung it open.

Koroku's grinning face was possibly the most disappointing sight he had seen all winter.

"Geez, Ashitaka. Lighten up," Koroku said, noting Ashitaka's deflated expression. "It's not like I'm the harbinger of death or anything."

"I'm sorry." Ashitaka ran his fingers through his hair sheepishly. "It is good to see you again, Koroku. What brings you all the way out here?"

Koroku's chest puffed out and broad grin plastered itself onto his face. "I came to tell you that Toki had her baby. It's a boy!"

"That's wonderful! Congratulations!" Ashitaka exclaimed, embracing his friend. He heard Koroku suppress a sniffle. "Why don't you stay and have some tea. You must be cold from your journey."

"I c-can't," Koroku hiccupped. "Toki told me to bring you back to Iron Town. She wants you to see the baby. And the rest of the town misses you too."

Ashitaka's heart leapt at the idea. He had barely seen his friends through the long winter. He rather missed Toki's sharp tongue, Eboshi's sly smirks, and even Gonza's accusatory glares.

"Just give me a few moments," he said, running into his house. After he had properly layered himself for the cold and slipped on a sturdy pair of boots, he joined Koroku on the door step once again.

They made a short detour to the stall that adjoined the side of the small cabin. Ashitaka unlatched and opened the door. He laughed when he heard Yakkul snort irritably as she was awakened. Stepping around his annoyed companion, Ashitaka refilled the feed box that hung on the back wall and scooped fresh snow into the water trough.

Yakkul raised her elegant head and nickered softly to him. Ashitaka ran a broad hand across her neck, fingers carding in her thick winter coat.

"I won't be gone for that long," he promised, patting Yakkul's muzzle.

She leaned into Ashitaka's touch and licked his gloved hand affectionately.

Outside, Koroku waited for him. He was pacing anxiously and had ground the snow under his feet to slush.

"Is something wrong?" Ashitaka asked.

Koroku paused and shook his head. "It's nothing. It's just that… I've never left Toki with the baby for so long—"

"—and you want to get back to them," Ashitaka finished, "I understand. We'll hurry."

They walked, chatting amiably as they followed the trail of footprints Koroku had left earlier. Ashitaka mostly listened as Koroku narrated the more horrific moments of Toki's pregnancy.

"If there's one thing you should never do while your wife is pregnant," Koroku advised sagely, "it's mention her weight. Never, _ever_ make a single comment about her size. Even when she looks like a giant blowfish, keep your mouth shut. There's still a dent in our wall from when Toki threw a kettle at me."

Ashitaka laughed, imagining an enraged, bloated Toki hurling kitchenware at her cowering husband.

As they rose over the crest of another hill, the sight of Iron Town emerged.

Once again, Ashitaka marveled at the transformation the town had undergone. It had metamorphosed from an industrial fortress to a busy commercial center. Gone were the spiked fortifications and the acrid fumes of the furnace. Riflemen no longer patrolled the perimeter. The dark atmosphere of the old Iron Town had lifted like a veil of smoke.

Ashitaka trailed behind Koroku as they passed through the gates and followed the broad, main street to the bustling market center.

Accustomed to the bleakness of winter, Ashitaka was caught off-guard by the flurry of activity. Women and men were already setting up stalls. The slap and crunch of trout on ice rang out from the fishermen's corner. An elderly woman hummed as she kneaded dough with flour-stained hands. Two toddlers chased a dog, their shoes clapping against the stone pavilion, their mother's weary chastisement following. Everywhere Ashitaka turned there were people arguing, laughing, gossiping, and filling the air with a cacophony of sounds. It was a welcome purge of the silence that had occupied his ears for so long.

Ashitaka was led through one of the narrow pathways that branched off from the market square. Here, it was a residential area, houses lining both sides of the street.

Koroku stopped in front of one of them. It was distinguished from the others only by the peeling red paint on its door. He slid it open, and motioned for Ashitaka to proceed.

Ashitaka squinted as he stepped into the dim room. His ears caught a gentle crooning rising from one of the far corners. It was Toki, rocking a cradle and singing softly to the bundle inside. She looked up as they entered, and upon seeing them, her tired face brightened immediately.

"Ashitaka!" She practically flew to him, enveloping him in a bone-crushing hug. "Oh, you're getting more handsome every time I see you! Have you grown again? You better be careful. The other girls would ambush you. Oh, how I've missed you!" Another breath-stealing embrace followed.

"It's good to see you, too," Ashitaka said, laughing and squeezing her tight. Her hair was unbound for once, and its croppy ends tickled his nose.

Koroku sulked behind them, obviously off-put that his wife hadn't deigned to notice him.

A soft sneeze issued from the bundle in the cradle.

Like lightning, Koroku was beside it in an instant.

"Oh my god, is he alright? It sounds like he's getting sick! It could be typhoid, or measles, or the plague I heard going around in the south! Oh, I knew I shouldn't have left you. Daddy's here now."

"Koroku! Shut up!" Toki snapped, dragging her husband away, "I just spent an hour getting him to sleep, and I'll give you hell if you wake him up again."

"But--," Koroku protested. He was silenced by Toki's warning snarl.

In a whirlwind of activity, Toki assembled them all around the low table. Three pairs of utensils and earthenware bowls were set, and Toki spooned some stew that had been boiling into Ashitaka's bowl.

Ashitaka thanked her, keeping his voice hushed to a whisper. "How have you been, Toki?"

"Glad to be unpregnant," Toki replied, ladling some stew for Koroku. He was still looking at the cradle apprehensively. "Koroku, relax. The baby's not going to explode while you aren't looking."

"Explode?" Koroku paled.

Toki sighed and began to berate her husband mercilessly. It was obviously a routine task for her. Ashitaka watched them fondly as they bickered affectionately with each other.

"Toki, it's just that we have to be more careful. You know how quickly children can get sick."

"With all your fussing, Koroku, I'd think _you_ were the woman in this relationship instead of me."

Ashitaka snorted into his stew. Koroku colored and finally settled down, although he often shot furtive glances at the cradle.

"Ashitaka, when you have children of your own, make sure you don't smother your wife with your constant hovering," Toki advised. "I barely have had any room to breath since the baby was born."

"When did you have your baby, Toki?" Ashitaka inquired.

"The thirteenth. That would make it about… hmmmm… two weeks?" Toki shot him a dirty look. "I noticed that you weren't the first one at my bedside congratulating me. I had to send my useless Koroku to fetch you because you didn't seem to care enough to see me."

Ashitaka opened his mouth to apologize.

"I'm just kidding." Toki waved her hand dismissively and laughed. "I know you would have come if you knew. Trust Koroku's child to come into world on the night of the worst blizzard Iron Town's ever seen."

A shrill cry came from the cradle. Koroku almost overturned the table as he sprang up. Instead, he tripped on his own feet and banged his head on the edge as he fell.

"Oh, damn." Toki stepped nonchalantly over her husband's prostrate form and went over to the cradle. She picked up the bundle within and began cooing gently to her son. In his mother's arms, he began to quiet down.

"Well," Toki said, "since he's up, Ashitaka, I'd like you to meet my son."

Ashitaka set his bowl aside, and let her place her baby gently into his arms.

"Say 'hi' to Ashitaka, Kenji."

Kenji blinked neutrally in response.

Ashitaka shifted Kenji carefully onto one arm. With his free hand, he stroked the soft whorls of dark hair on the baby's head.

"It's kinda hard to tell now," Toki said speculatively, "but I think he has my nose. He definitely has Koroku's big mouth judging by all the times I have to feed him."

"Hey!"

Ashitaka pressed his finger lightly into Kenji's hand. Tiny fingers wrapped tightly around it. Kenji smiled, his fat baby cheeks dimpling.

"Hey, he likes you," Toki exclaimed. "That's more than I can say for Koroku. Whenever his dad is near him, he just cries and cries."

"He just doesn't know me because you hog him all the time," Koroku muttered.

"You're a natural with kids," Toki continued, ignoring her husband. "You remember the Miwa twins who live down the road. The boys? Well, after that day you took them kite-flying, I found them at my door every morning for a week asking, 'When will Ashitaka come back to Iron Town? When, Auntie Toki. when?' They're mad about you. The other kids around here are too."

Ashitaka chuckled. He remembered Seiichi and Tomo's jubilant faces when he had fished their kite from a tree. He also recalled that they had a rather precocious eight-year-old sister, Aiko, who persistently asked him when he was going to marry her.

"Children are easy to get along with." Ashitaka rocked Kenji lightly.

"You think that now, but you obviously haven't woken up in the dead of night to feed one." Toki watched enviously as Kenji started to doze off. "You know, I've been wondering. Why don't you and San have a baby?"

The comment startled Ashitaka. He met Toki's eyes, and she shot him a pointed look.

"Oh, please. As if I'm not the only one who wants to know."

"I don't think so," he responded as evenly as he could, "San and I will probably just remain friends."

"Yeah," Toki scoffed, "and Gonza likes to put on Eboshi's kimonos at night and masquerade as a geisha."

Koroku choked on his stew.

Toki scowled. "Doesn't that girl pay any attention to you? She might think she's a wolf, but you're obviously a flesh and blood man. You have _needs_." She narrowed her eyes. "Well, don't you?"

Ashitaka flushed. Fortunately, Koroku intervened on his behalf.

"Um, Toki, I don't think Ashitaka is exactly comfortable discussing his _needs_ with us."

"Oh, hush, Koroku. It's not like we're not all mature adults here."

"Kenji isn't an adult," Koroku pointed out.

"Kenji doesn't count."

Kenji blew a spit bubble happily.

"Toki," Koroku pleaded, "Give Ashitaka some privacy."

Toki huffed. "Fine. But I still want to have a word with San and the way she's been neglecting you. When is she coming back anyways?"

"She should be home soon." Ashitaka tried not to appear as if he was reassuring himself as well.

"Well, where does she go every winter?"

"I don't know exactly. It's in her brother's territory in a different mountain range."

"I think it's a bit selfish of her to run off to god-knows-where and leave you in that cabin all by yourself." Toki scowled.

"I'm fine," Ashitaka assured, "I can take care of myself." Toki didn't appear to be very mollified.

To Ashitaka's relief, they turned their conversation towards the activities in town he had missed. Trade was booming. Iron-mining was a dying business as the town had switched to the textile manufacturing. Many of the women now worked with raw materials shipped in from suppliers in the west. As the three chattered amicably, Kenji slumbered peacefully in Toki's arms, unconscious of the noise nearby.

It was well-past midday before Ashitaka rose to return home.

"Koroku should travel back with you," Toki insisted, "I'm sure he wouldn't mind." She shot her husband a reprehensive look when he groaned.

"I'll be fine on my own, Toki. It was good to see you again, and the baby."

"Well, drop by more often. Things in Iron Town get a little dull without you." Toki winked, and Koroku nodded in agreement.

Ashitaka hugged them both goodbye. He had almost walked through the door when a large figure blocked his way.

It was Gonza. He looked surlier than usual.

"Ashitaka," he grunted.

"Hello, Gonza," Ashitaka said cautiously.

Gonza folded his arms across his chest imperiously and frowned at him like he was a newt in his rice.

"I'm here on milady's orders. She's invited you to her residence."

Ashitaka narrowed his eyes. Eboshi had never invited him to her private quarters before.

"Why wou—"

"I have no idea," Gonza snapped. "But I'm here to make sure you get there. Now move it!"

Kenji began to cry in Toki's arms.

"You idiot!" she fumed, "You woke him up again!"

Gonza backed out of the door hastily before Toki could reach for the nearest projectile.

Ashitaka gave a baffled Koroku and furious Toki a reassuring smile before he left as well.

* * *

Grumbling and muttering, Gonza led Ashitaka to the east side of town. The townspeople were wide awake now and the streets were busier than ever. Salesmen cried out their wares from crowded stalls. Here and there, survivors of the old Iron Town recognized him and greeted him cheerfully as he passed by. 

He was waving to one of them when a young girl running through the streets nearly bowled him over.

"Ow!" she exclaimed, as she slammed into him. Ashitaka grabbed her by the shoulders to steady her as she wobbled precariously.

"I'm so, so, so very sorry," the girl whispered repeatedly under her breath.

"It's alright," he assured, although the shoulder which she collided with flexed painfully in protest.

The girl looked up at him. A horrified expression crossed her features.

"Oh, it's you!" she squeaked, turning red. "I— Oh my goodness… I-I-I need to go."

Before Ashitaka could say another word, she bolted. A group of girls waited for her on the other side of the street. When she reached them, they gathered around her and began whispering conspiratorially. They shot a glance Ashitaka's way and giggled collectively.

His confusion was penetrated only by Gonza's impatient bark telling him to hurry up.

When they reached Eboshi's residence, Ashitaka was a bit surprised by how mundane it looked. It wasn't too different from the same wood beam structure Ashitaka had seen everywhere else. There were no features glamorous enough to indicate that the most powerful figure in the town lived inside. The only noticeable variation was that it was bigger.

As Ashitaka stepped inside, the first thing he registered was the smell of incense. The air was permeated by a sweet, floral scent. He recognized it as the fragrance Eboshi was fond of wearing.

The interior walls were threadbare save for a large stretch of silk that hung from the widest wall. There was calligraphy on it, a few black characters that sprawled across the fabric.

_Sit, walk, or run, but don't stumble._

The door to his left slid open.

"Welcome, Ashitaka."

Although Moro had snatched away her arm so many years ago, Eboshi remained much the poised politician he had first met. She was wearing a heavy winter kimono of light blue. Her hair was pulled back in its traditional topknot and the gold of her earrings winked in the darkness. The only make-up that adorned her face was the bright slash of red across her lips.

She was smiling far too widely for Ashitaka's comfort.

"Eboshi." He bowed stiffly.

"You may leave us now, Gonza." Lady Eboshi said, approaching Ashitaka in a predatory fashion. Gonza glared warningly at Ashitaka but stepped aside.

"Come now, Ashitaka. We'll be having tea in my bedroom."

"What!" Gonza screeched to a halt. "Are you sure that's appropriate, milady?"

Eboshi looked nonplussed. "The conversation I want to have with Ashitaka requires the utmost privacy," she explained. A coy tilt played upon her red lips. "Don't worry, Gonza. Ashitaka is a good boy. He'll behave."

Gonza's face turned an intriguing shade of puce.

"Come now." Lady Eboshi motioned towards the door.

Eboshi's bedroom was illuminated by the soft, red light of two lanterns overhead. A sleeping pallet had been rolled up and set aside so that a small table could fit in the center. A tea set was laid out.

"Please," Eboshi beckoned, "Sit."

Ashitaka complied, feeling slightly like a cornered animal. He watched apprehensively as Eboshi poured tea into his cup. She managed everything quite gracefully even with her handicap.

"Forgive me for being so sudden," Eboshi said as she filled her own cup, "I hope I find you well."

"Well enough," Ashitaka replied tersely. He distrusted the honeyed pitch of Eboshi's voice.

"This winter has been a harsh one. A few years ago, we would never have made it through. But this little town has saved itself countless of times. Despite everything," Eboshi smiled falteringly, "Despite me."

"Many of the people here wouldn't have anything if it weren't for you," Ashitaka replied encouragingly. "The people endure because of you."

"Do you think so?" She looked up at him through a filter of dark lashes. Her eyes were two ink spots on her rice paper face. For a fleeting moment, she looked vulnerable.

It surprised him. Eboshi never showed her cards.

"Look around you," Ashitaka insisted, "The people are happier than they ever were. The town is thriving."

Eboshi stared pensively into the cup in her hand, blowing lightly at the steam that rose and clouded her face.

"Do you really think the people need me?" she murmured quietly.

Ashitaka reached over the table and placed a hand on her arm. Eboshi's eyes widened fractionally, but she didn't recoil.

"You are part of this town. You always will be."

Eboshi's smile was more genuine this time. He could see a bit of her mask chipping away.

With the exception of the clinking of lacquer cups, they passed the time in silence. Both sipped mutely at the jasmine tea. Its warmth was soothing, and Ashitaka felt the previous tension in his gut unraveling.

When Eboshi did speak, she said the last thing he could have expected.

"I'm getting married this spring."

* * *

Since she had given no preamble, Eboshi supposed it was acceptable for Ashitaka to spew tea all over her expensive Chinese rug. 

"You—" he wheezed, "could have told me this earlier."

"And miss seeing the expression on your face?" She grinned. "I think not."

Ashitaka's mouth creased into a thin line. From the furrow deepening between his brows, Eboshi could tell he did not share her amusement.

He set his cup down firmly; the clack resounded off the walls.

"I want to know what this is about. From the beginning."

Eboshi gave a long-suffering sigh. "Alright. As you know," she began, "Iron Town has been trading with the city of Umishi for nearly three years now."

She didn't mention how it was largely Iron Town's alliance with the port city that allowed it to be resuscitated after the fall of the Forest Spirit.

"The Saito family runs the majority of Umishi. It's through our trade with them that we've been able to wean ourselves off of iron. They send us the raw materials. We manufacture the cloth, return it back to them, and they ship it all over Japan through their ports. They've been very good to us, Ashitaka. Especially Lord Saito himself. He's been extremely generous to me in particular. But despite his seemingly unconditional benevolence, he is a businessman. I have wondered many times what motivated him to help us.

"When he last visited his intentions became clear. He came with a proposition. Under its terms, Iron Town would receive the financial backing to acquire our own shipping dock and manage a portion of our exports and imports. That way, we can buy supplies for the town without any intermediate intervention. In return, Saito and his family would become our exclusive buyers. Iron Town's cloths would sell strictly to them." She looked away. "Also, I would marry Haru Saito.

Lord Saito has four sons. The youngest of them is named Haru. I haven't yet ascertained the reason why, but Lord Saito is more than eager to get rid of him. I've tried to look into it, but their family is extremely closed off. I'm certain there is something awry if his family wants to marry him off to a crippled woman."

"So you don't know anything about him?" Ashitaka asked, frowning.

"No. I have only heard of him through his father. I know he is only twenty. It makes me feel old." She laughed dryly. "The reason I called you here today is because I need to ask a favor of you. Other than Saito's unusual son, I have little qualms about their family. However, Saito does have other relatives in high places. He is a cousin of Lord Asano."

Eboshi noticed the way Ashitaka's fists tightened reflexively.

The boy forgave easily, but he never forgot.

"What would you have me do? Fight him?" There was a sharp, metal edge buried in his soft voice.

"Of course not, Ashitaka. Lord Asano doesn't want to start a war with us. He knows what we're capable of. However, he does have a certain amount of… influence on his more favorable cousin."

"Then what do you need of me?"

"Lord Asano remembers quite clearly what happened the last time he tried to meddle in Iron Town's affairs. However, greed can cloud even the most potent memories. No doubt he'll be interested in our burgeoning business. I'm afraid that he might inflame his cousin's ambitions so that Saito wants to take over Iron Town and forsake collaboration. I can't risk that. When Lord Asano is here, I want him to remember who he is dealing with. That's why I need you to be with me when their family comes. Your presence will ward off any stray ideas he may have."

"You want me to scare Lord Asano out of being interested in Iron Town?" Ashitaka asked disbelievingly.

"I wouldn't exactly use the word 'scare.' It's more of a cautionary procedure." Eboshi grinned wickedly. "His men are still telling horror stories about you. The last one I heard was quite interesting. You apparently resemble a blue tengu with six arms which you use to rip apart your victims before drinking their blood. As if it were sake."

Ashitaka's scoffed. However, Eboshi noticed that the corners of his lips twitched upwards.

"That's why I need you around," Eboshi explained. "Lord Asano won't try anything if the famous Ashitaka is still protecting Iron Town. He knows his men would rather soil themselves than fight you."

"So," Ashitaka said tentatively, "all I have to do is show up and look menacing."

"That's right." She briefly appraised him. "You might want to consider changing a few things about your appearance. You don't look very intimidating."

To be truthful, Eboshi actually thought Ashitaka was far too good-looking for the part. Granted, the slow smile and piercing blue eyes were lethal among the town's female populace. However, Eboshi didn't think Lord Asano's soldiers would be too impressed.

Unless they were up against an army of women.

"I'll ask Toki and her friends to make sure you look barbaric enough."

Ashitaka sheepishly ran a hand through his unruly hair. "I'm still not sure about this."

Eboshi's bright kimono fabric bunched in her fists. An awkward silence elapsed between them.

"I'll pay you," she said desperately.

Ashitaka burst into laughter. "All right, Eboshi. You don't have to pay me. I'll help you."

Eboshi smiled broadly without any trace of coyness or cunning. "Thank you, Ashitaka. Thank you so very much."

"There's just one thing," he said. "About this marriage. Are you— are you sure you want to do this?" His eyes were concerned.

That was the beauty of Ashitaka, Eboshi reflected. He truly cared about another person's happiness.

"Yes, I'm sure."

"But you don't love him," Ashitaka protested. "You don't even know this man."

"It's not for love. It's for business," Eboshi replied flatly.

"No one would want you to force yourself through this."

"We can't all wait on someone for the rest of our lives."

Eboshi watched as an unguarded emotion flickered across Ashitaka's face. It was brief, but her quick eyes caught the change.

"Ah." She raised an eyebrow. "Trouble in paradise?"

Ashitaka didn't flinch at her probing gaze, and his eyes betrayed nothing. However, Eboshi noticed the slight tightening of his jaw, the crease between his brows, the way his mouth pressed into a thin line. It all spoke volumes.

Eboshi knew Ashitaka didn't like others prying into his private affairs. It was one of the reasons he chose to live apart from Iron Town. He preferred a quiet life, one without the clamor of townspeople fawning over him or whispering in awe as he passed.

The Hero of Iron Town. She understood how uncomfortably he wore that title.

Also, San didn't come often to Ashitaka when he was in Iron Town. She was even more ill at ease with the murmuring and gawking strangers. Ashitaka had taken vast efforts to distance himself from curious eyes and ears. Sometimes Eboshi didn't know whose life he was so jealously guarding, his own or San's.

However, despite all of the barriers he had erected, people still talked. There wasn't a single person in Iron Town who didn't know he was in love with San.

Eboshi wondered if he knew about the betting pool. The people of Iron Town, especially the women, had staked impressive sums of money on certain aspects of their relationship. Eboshi thought it was all highly entertaining if a bit unhealthily obsessive. The two had already disappointed a majority of the populace with the slow pace of their relationship. She wondered if Ashitaka would hurry up things up if he knew his delay was proving to be a costly investment to many gamblers.

There were also hordes of women eagerly waiting for a chance to end his celibate lifestyle.

"You know," Eboshi said suggestively, "There are a lot of women in Iron Town who wouldn't give you half as much trouble as that wolf-girl of yours."

Ashitaka stiffened.

"If you want, I could drop in a few good words. It wouldn't be hard. You're young, handsome—"

"No." His tone was icy.

Eboshi shrugged. "Suit yourself. But you might want to consider if that wolf-girl is more trouble than she's worth."

Ashitaka rose abruptly from the table. "Thank you, Lady Eboshi. When will you be needing me?"

Eboshi chided herself for baiting him. Sometimes she just couldn't resist. He was so easy, so open.

She needed to mend things now. Standing, she placed a placating hand on his arm.

"Forgive me, Ashitaka. I had no right."

His expression softened. "When can I help?"

"Early March. About two weeks from now. Saito is bringing his family and the formal betrothal will be held then."

"I'll be there." He hesitated. "Does the rest of the town know about this?"

"They will in time."

Internally, Eboshi grimaced at the commotion her betrothal would cause.

"I need to be returning home now," he said, "I've overstayed, and I've probably upset Yakkul."

Eboshi wanted to express her sympathies that he was going home to an elk and not a woman. But she bit her tongue instead.

Eboshi escorted Ashitaka to the front door. When she slid it open, her kimono sleeves fluttered in the brisk winter wind.

Outside, Gonza was patrolling the perimeter of her house. He tried and failed to appear coincidental about his presence.

"Travel safely, Ashitaka," Eboshi cautioned.

"Thank you. Goodbye!" He bowed, brushed past her, and hopped down the steps.

* * *

In a short time, Ashitaka had traveled through the town gates. He slowed as he trekked uphill, beside the muddy trail that led him closer to the forest. Within a few minutes, the sounds of Iron Town had subsided to white noise, once again replaced by the blanket of winter quiet. 

However, around him, the signs of spring were everywhere. Patches of yellowed grass speared through the thinner sheets of snow. A rabbit nibbled at one of them and fled as he approached. Twice, Ashitaka glimpsed sparrows darting across the sky.

The forest was awakening again.

When he approached his home, the sound of pawing hooves indicated that Yakkul had heard him arrive. A loud snort issued from behind the closed stall.

Ashitaka unlatched the door and was greeted by a long muzzle. He yelped when Yakkul butted him gently and shoved him backwards into a snowbank.

"You didn't have to do that," Ashitaka grumbled, brushing himself off. "I know I'm late. I'm sorry. Things didn't go exactly as I planned." He sighed, gave up cleaning himself, and flopped back onto the snow. Closing his eyes, he emptied his mind of everything but the low whisper of the wind through the trees.

A loud snuffling alerted him to Yakkul's presence. She nibbled affectionately at his sleeve, her way of showing that all was forgiven.

Ashitaka looked up into the gray sky. A screen of clouds filtered out the dying sunlight, dimming everything to a hazy yellow.

"I wish San was here," he murmured quietly.

A long, wet tongue swiped across his cheek. Grimacing, Ashitaka patted Yakkul.

"Thanks, but you're not the one I need that kind of attention from."

She snorted and lowered her head. He grabbed one of her antlers and complied when she hoisted him up.

"Come on. I'll take you out for a run. You're probably stiff from being inside all day."

Yakkul nickered her approval.

It only took Ashitaka a few moments to find her reigns. Bridle in place, he tugged and urged her forward.

The path they ran along was still completely hidden under snow. However, Ashitaka could have walked it in his sleep. Yakkul, sensing the familiarity of the surroundings, quickened her pace and pulled more insistently at her reigns. Ashitaka allowed her to lead them to the edge of a clearing.

The water was frozen and the trees were bare. The silence in the air, free of the clicks and clacks of Kodama, was chilling. However, the pool of the Great Forest Spirit was unmistakable. Even in the dead of winter, it never lost its aura of mystique and wonder.

Ashitaka always thought that the air was thicker here; it was crowded with a restless energy he couldn't explain. It drew along his nerves like a rusty blade, making him feel more impulsive, more reckless, as if something primal was gnawing at the edge of his senses.

A distant memory flickered across edge of his consciousness. It was last summer. The air had been filled with the rushing of water and the piping whistles of songbirds.

And there was San.

* * *

_San laughed. It was a clean, bright sound that scythed through the thick, humid air._

_Ashitaka attempted to appear disgruntled, but he couldn't help but grin as well._

"_It's not that easy," he insisted._

_Shoulders still shaking with mirth, San crept to his side. Planting her hands on the wet sand, she peered into the water below. Small, silvery shapes darted beneath the glittering surface._

"_You just need to learn how. Watch carefully."_

_Obediently, Ashitaka watched. It wasn't hard since he was used to watching San._

_He observed the way the sunlight fell across her shoulders, cloaking her in gold. Her skin, pale and creamy during the colder months, had acquired a honeyed tone. A few droplets of water dotted her arms and gleamed like diamond bangles in the sun. Her dark eyes narrowed as she skimmed the surface of the water. Slowly, she ran the pink tip of her tongue across her lips._

_Ashitaka felt a sudden bolt of heat lance through him._

_San struck._

_There was barely a splash as she plunged her arms into the water. When she withdrew, a small mass of glimmering scales wriggled in her clutches. Quickly, she dashed the fish against a rock, and it stopped squirming._

"_See?" she said, wiping off her hands on her skirt. "It's simple."_

"_Easy for you to say," Ashitaka grumbled._

_San beckoned him closer to her side and leaned her head close to his. Their temples almost touched. She was close enough to share his breath._

"_You see where the fish are swimming in the shadows?"_

_Ashitaka nodded, half-heartedly paying attention. San's scent was overwhelming. Other than the earthy, rich scent of the forest, he could detect a faint trace of something else. It was a light, barely noticeable, and distinctly feminine. It made his mouth run dry and his palms clammy with sweat._

"_If you lean over the water at the right angle," she continued, "they gather in your shadow."_

_She turned towards him. Ashitaka tried valiantly to keep his mind on the fish._

_Yes. Fish. They were cool and slick to the touch. Unlike San. San's skin would be soft, smooth, and sun-warmed under palms._

_If he reached out he would know._

"_Remember," she said, her words blowing hotly into his ear. "If you keep your arms within the shadow of your body, they won't notice you."_

_Ashitaka fought the tremor that surged up his spine._

"_Now lean forward. I'll tell you when."_

_From the corner of his eye, something sparkled and caught his attention. A bead of water trailed down San's neck, across the shallow indentation at the base of her throat, and disappeared into the hollow between her breasts._

_Ashitaka suddenly had a desire to follow its path with his mouth._

"_NOW!"_

_Instinctively, he lunged forward, vaguely remembering the task at hand. However, he overshot his reach and lost his balance. Flailing, he fell face-first into the stream._

_Water rushed into his mouth and ears. He gave great, whooping coughs as he rose to the surface. After he wiped some of the algae off his face, he saw San curled upon the bank, rocking back and forth and laughing hysterically._

"_What," she wheezed, "what was that?"_

"_I lost my balance," Ashitaka replied sulkily._

"_Really?" San quirked an eyebrow._

_Something squirmed in Ashitaka's pocket, making him jump. He reached in and seized the intruder. When he pulled his hand out, he was rewarded with the annoyed glare of a voluminous bullfrog._

_It croaked._

_San broke into fresh peals of laughter. Tears streaked down her face, and she clutched her sides as if she would burst._

_Ashitaka released the frog back into the water. With San preoccupied, he stalked closer to the shore. When he was near enough, his hand shot out of the water and seized her ankle._

"_What are—" Before San could protest, Ashitaka snaked an arm around her waist and dragged her in. San's shrieks of indignation were drowned out as Ashitaka dunked her thoroughly. When she surfaced, spluttering, she scowled at the broad, innocent grin on his face._

_With a cry, she tackled him._

_A water war raged on for some time. Both parties resorted to cheating copiously. Ashitaka used his leverage to tickle San mercilessly. In retaliation, San shoved generous amounts of mud into his pants, causing him to squelch unpleasantly. They diverted briefly to splashing Yakkul, who was resting peacefully at the water's edge. She rose, shook off the water, and shot both of them a distasteful look before relocating herself a good distance away._

_When they finally dragged themselves back onto the bank, sopping wet, they were exhausted._

_San flopped onto the ground, closing her eyes and breathing heavily._

_Ashitaka sat beside her, tucking his legs to his body and wrapping his arms around his knees. He winced when he felt a faint suction between his legs. Apparently he hadn't gotten rid of all the mud._

_Beside him, San sighed and stretched luxuriously. Ashitaka heard the faint 'pop' of her joints as she flexed. The thin, wet fabric of her dress clung to her lithe frame, tracing the curve of her waist and swell of her breasts._

_Ashitaka looked away. He reminded himself that nudity didn't hold the same implications to San as it did for other people. Indeed, he remembered a singular incident when she had invited him for a swim and had stripped almost completely naked before she caught him gawking incredulously at her._

"_Ashitaka?" _

"_Yes?" he said, turning._

_San smiled up at him, her eyes softened by the dark fan of her lashes._

_Years of wanting and waiting crashed against the worn wall of Ashitaka's resistance. It collapsed with one, simple smile from San's well-loved face._

_He leaned over and kissed her._

_His mouth cut off her sharp intake of breath. Her lips were soft, so soft, and he kissed her lightly, unreasonably afraid that she would shatter like glass._

_San froze._

_Ashitaka jerked back, dazed, ecstatic, and terrified all at once. An apology was nearly issuing from his mouth before he opened his eyes and saw San staring back at him._

_Her eyes were wide and luminous. She brought a hand to her mouth and shyly traced a finger across her lips._

_It wasn't encouragement or permission. But it was enough._

_With a growl, Ashitaka plunged into the second kiss, a parched man diving for water. _

_This time, he didn't bother to temper his hunger. He sucked greedily on her full, bottom lip and drank in her surprised gasp. His body was twisted awkwardly and hovered precariously over hers. They were both still soaking wet and San's clothes smelled slightly of fish. But he was beyond caring. All that mattered was that San was there, soft and pliant under his hands._

_He curled his fingers around the wispy hair at the nape of her neck and brought her closer, deeper into the kiss. Her taste was intoxicating, tangy-sweet like the berries they had gathered that morning. His other hand roamed from her hip to edge of her ribs. He felt her tremble slightly as his fingertips glided across a sensitive spot on her side._

_One of San's hands fluttered against his chest. It slid across his belly and settled against the inside of his thigh._

_Ashitaka's blood roared in his ears. Wrapping his arms around her, he lifted her so that their bodies pressed together. The rub of her breasts against his chest caused him to buck sharply against her hips._

_Then San's lips parted._

_A wave of heat erupted in him, pooling between his legs. _

_Naturally, Ashitaka did what any other young man would have done in his predicament._

_He slipped his tongue in._

_San drew away. Ashitaka groaned in protest and tried to recapture her lips. She brought her hand between them, and he ended up kissing her palm instead._

"_What was that?"_

_Ashitaka stilled and stared, dumbfounded._

_San looked genuinely puzzled. "When you put your mouth on mine. What was that?"_

"_You… that… k-kiss," Ashitaka spluttered, confounded._

_San cocked her head in a distinctly dog-like fashion. "A kiss?"_

"_Yes," Ashitaka panted. "What we did. That was a kiss."_

"_This?" San closed the short distance between them and pressed her lips firmly against his. Ashitaka's eyes fluttered close. He was disappointed that when they pulled apart, San looked far more composed than he was feeling._

"_Yes," he responded, his voice raspy, "that was a kiss."_

"_Oh," San said, eyes brightening, "I've done that before."_

"_What?" Ashitaka didn't mean to shout. A barb of jealousy had spiked through him, sharp and unexpected. "With who?" His grip on San's arm tightened._

"_With you of course." San frowned at Ashitaka's blank stare. "When you still had the mark. The Great Forest Spirit had just healed you. You were on the water bank on the island, and you were still weak. You couldn't chew your food. I had to do it for you."_

"_Oh," Ashitaka said, feeling immensely stupid and relieved._

"_Wasn't that a kiss?"_

"_No! I mean—yes. That was a kiss. But this one is different." Ashitaka fumbled for the words. "This one meant something else."_

_San looked at him innocently. "What did it mean?"_

_Ashitaka's mind reeled. There were a thousand things he wanted say, to show._

'_I want you. I need you. I can't bear it when you leave and just thinking about it hurts. But what hurts the most is when we're together. Like this. Everyday. When you're right in front of me and at the same time as distant as a star._

_I love you. Every time you smile at me I'm one step closer to telling you and two steps farther away. Because I'm afraid. I'm afraid I could ruin everything, and I'd rather have you close and unknowing than not at all._'

_The words congealed in a thick lump in his throat, fighting for a voice. He swallowed them regretfully._

"_It means I care for you."_

_It was an honest if abridged truth._

_San beamed at him, radiating pleasure at something so simple, so obvious._

"_Really?"_

"_Yes." The word rushed out of Ashitaka's mouth, fierce with honesty._

_San wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him towards her, kissing him firmly. He could feel the outline of her smile against his lips._

_He felt as if he would burst from wanting._

_But San was innocent, far too innocent. She had seen war and death, and both have aged her beyond her years. But she had remained unmarked by a man's questioning touch. _

_Until today. _

_Ashitaka was flooded with an immense hatred for himself. He had been so reckless. How could he demand anything from San when she didn't even know what to give? How long would it take her to learn? How long could he keep waiting?_

_Was it worth waiting for?_

_Ashitaka tucked San's head under his chin and hugged her tightly. He felt the quick pace of her heart against his own and found his answer in their joined rhythm._

_He could search the entire world ten times over and never find anyone who felt so perfect._

"_Yes." He whispered, breathing in the clean scent of her hair. The truth hummed in his chest, beating its wings against the cage of his heart._

"_Always."_


	3. Spring I

**Author's Note:** Ahaha. Slow isn't an adequate word for the pace I'm going, I know. However, I hope it's reassuring that I do intend to stick with the story and have the next chapters planned out in my head. Life is hectic, and I try to wheedle in as much time for writing as possible.

To the lovely, lovely people who have reviewed so far, I thank you with the fiery passion of a thousand suns. It's always nice to get feedback. It's fantastic to get positive feedback. Knowing that people are waiting for that next update is what keeps me typing through the long hours of the night

Sidenote: I watched Princess Mononoke for the first time in Japanese (Sad, I know). I _love_ San's voice actress. Claire Dane's wasn't bad, but the Japanese VA has such a softer tone.

Sidenote II: Tweaked the previous chapters. Shall never again post without reading thoroughly for format changes.

Sidenote III: Mega brownie points to whomever figures out what San's other brother will be named.

My gracious appreciation once again to my attentive beta Danyu.

**Kisetsu**

_Chapter Three: Children and Fairytales_

"Wait for me!"

Seiichi glanced back at his sister and rolled his eyes. Ahead of him, their brother, Tomo, snickered.

"Hurry up, Aiko!" Seiichi called, "You're such a slug!"

Aiko bared her teeth at him as she carefully picked her way downhill. A raggedy, stuffed cow lay nestled in the crook of her arm. The rusty bell around its neck jingled with each of her hesitant steps.

Her brothers navigated down the hillside expertly, sliding through the muddy trail with ease. With a splash, they landed into a puddle that had collected at the base. Both boys laughed delightedly, taking the opportunity to splash each other.

Meanwhile, Aiko closed in steadily, gathering the hem of her skirt up in a hopeless attempt to keep it from dragging along the ground.

"You should ditch the stupid cow," Tomo said. He yelped as his brother shoved a ball of mud down the back of his shirt.

Aiko clung tighter to her doll. "Mou Mou doesn't like the mud!" she protested.

"I don't know about that." Tomo gestured furtively to Seiichi. His twin winked back and buried his fist into the wet earth, scooping up a handful. "He might just have to get used to it!"

Together, they barraged their sister with their gooey ammunition.

Aiko let out a horrified shriek. "I'm telling mom on you!" she squawked, shielding herself with her doll.

The boys retaliated by hurling more mud. A clod flew through the air and hit Aiko square in the face. The boys whooped as she was knocked onto her rear.

"Run for it!" Seiichi cried.

The twins bolted, sprinting across the beaten dirt road and into the meadow. They crushed new grass shoots under flying feet, mud sucking noisily in their wake. It didn't take them long to reach the first barrier of trees. They stopped to catch their breaths.

"Do you think we lost her?" Seiichi asked hopefully.

"I think so," Tomo wheezed, hunched over with exertion. When he recovered, he grinned toothily. "Can you believe we got here? Mom will kill us if she knows."

"Nah," Seiichi waved a hand dismissively, "She's too busy with the wedding stuff. She won't know that we're out of town for hours."

"Then we better hurry up," Tomo advised.

They were about to depart when a muddy ball of a nine-year old hurtled out of the field and into Tomo. They both fell over with a considerable thump.

"We're not… supposed… to be… here," Aiko panted.

"Getteroffme!" Tomo yelled. Seiichi stepped in and untangled his siblings.

"Let's go home," Aiko pleaded, "We not allowed near the forest. Mama says it's dangerous. There are wolves, and boars, and other—other _things_ inside."

"Aw, don't be such a coward." Tomo brushed himself off and gave her a stern look of disapproval. "You said you wanted to play hide-and-seek. All the grown-ups in town are acting crazy because of Lady Eboshi's wedding. We can't play there without getting yelled at. So Seiichi and I brought you here."

"_But I don't want to play here!_" Aiko cried tearfully. She hid her face behind her doll, clutching him so hard Seiichi was surprised his remaining button-eye didn't pop off. "It's scary here," she whispered. Her eyes darted around as if the trees were conspiring against her.

"Don't be such a baby," Seiichi rebuked, "You don't really believe all those stories Dad tells you. Do you?" Aiko sniffled.

"Well if that's the case, then—_you're it!_ Lean up against this tree, close your eyes, and count to twenty. We won't be too far, so it won't be hard to find us."

"But I'll get lost! I don't know how to—"

Her brothers had turned and darted into the forest before she could utter another word.

"How mad do you think mom will get at us for ditching her?" Tomo asked as he wove through trees and side-stepping roots and branches.

"Plenty," Seiichi replied, sprinting beside him. "But you know Aiko. She'll just sit there and cry. Besides, it's not like there's anything dangerous that—"

A shrill scream pierced the air. The boys froze.

"That sounded like—"

"Aiko," Seiichi gasped. He saw his own horror mirrored in Tomo's eyes.

* * *

"I feel ridiculous," Ashitaka said sulkily. 

"Oh, quit being such a grump." Toki cheerfully smeared more paint across his cheeks. "I think blue makes you look rather dashing."

Ashitaka sighed. He was beginning to doubt the virtue of Eboshi's suggestion. She had suggested that Toki could toughen up his appearance. She never mentioned submitting to a full-body paint job.

Toki stepped back, hands placed on her hips, and surveyed her work. "Not bad, if I do say so myself. Let's ask the others what they think." She cupped her hands to her mouth and yelled, "Girls!"

On cue, about a dozen women poured into the warehouse. They practically seeped through the floorboards, swarming around Ashitaka like a flies on honey.

"Ooooh, nice going, Toki!'

"The blue is definitely a nice touch."

"I think we should line his eyes in black. Make it more dramatic."

"He still looks too 'nice' though."

"I bet you'd like to fix that."

Ashitaka struggled to breathe as the crushing wall of women around him broke into a round of raucous laughter.

"Maybe we should rip up some clothes. It'll make him look more rugged and savage."

"Better yet, let's strip him. Now _that_ will make him look barbaric."

"Yeah! Let's start with the shirt."

"What? Wait!" Ashitaka protested. To his infinite distress, a vast multitude of hands began seizing and tugging at his clothing.

When Gonza arrived on the scene, he didn't appear to be at all surprised to find Ashitaka in various states of undress with a room full of women.

"Ladies," he said, calling for attention. The women paused in their siege. It gave Ashitaka the chance to pry away the hands that lingered on his person and a few that were sliding intrusively southwards. "Lady Eboshi requests an immediate audience with Ashitaka."

There were sounds of disappointment heard all around. Ashitaka breathed a sigh of relief as the women dispersed and made their exodus. As they filed out, several winked coyly and blew kisses in his direction.

Refastening his belt, Ashitaka shot Toki a glare. She was grinning rather peevishly.

"Come on, Ashitaka," Toki said, grabbing his hand, "It's time to see what Eboshi makes of my work."

Her cackle was not at all reassuring.

* * *

Eboshi was not in her private quarters. Instead, Toki, Gonza, and Ashitaka walked more towards the central portion of town, to a stately-looking lodge not far from the main gate. It was where she usually greeted her guests and conducted business affairs. 

When they entered, Eboshi was deep in conversation with four or five harassed-looking women—no doubt making preparations for the next day.

Eboshi caught sight of them. When her narrowed eyes flickered over Ashitaka, she smiled, slow and cat-like.

"Why, Ashitaka," she purred. "Isn't this a change?"

The women around Eboshi scattered as she rose. She circled Ashitaka once, then twice. He felt vaguely uncomfortable as her eyes raked calculatingly over his body.

Eboshi traced a finger delicately along his bicep and smirked when her fingertip came away blue.

"My, this is quite extraordinary."

Toki sniggered, "I couldn't help it milady. It had to be done."

Ashitaka shifted restlessly. He was covered in a whirlwind of blue, black, and white. Paint streaked across his chest in broad, diagonal stripes and spiraled down both his arms. Soot and dirt had been layered on top of that, enough so that it looked as if personal hygiene was a rather vague concept to him. His shirt was a bit shredded from being assaulted by Iron Town's women, and Toki had spent an inordinate amount of time making sure his hair was correctly tousled.

"Good work, Toki," Eboshi said, taking in Ashitaka's face, "I like what you did here. Very fierce."

"I hope so." Toki preened. "It was hard work getting him to look anything but gorgeous."

The women in the room broke into giggles. Even Ashitaka cracked a shy, flustered smile.

"How do you feel about it, Ashitaka?" Eboshi inquired.

"I guess it's alright." Ashitaka peered down at himself. "Um, will it wash off?"

Eboshi laughed. Toki smacked him on the back indignantly. "Of course it will! What kind of question is that?"

"Well, I'm very pleased. You've far exceeded my expectations." Eboshi's features tightened into a more serious expression as she turned to Toki. "I want you to have everything ready for tomorrow."

"Yes, milady," Toki replied with all the diligence of a soldier saluting a general.

"And Ashitaka, you'll need to arrive early."

"I understand," he said.

"Well then, now that that's settled." Eboshi grinned wickedly. "I'm curious what our dear Lord Asano will think."

* * *

Yakul did not take kindly to Ashitaka's transformation. She reared, hooves flying and nostrils flared in a panic, as he approached. 

"Settle down." Ashitaka extended his arm, offering his hand up for inspection. "See? It's me."

Yakul took a moment to sniff him suspiciously before nickering in recognition and licking his fingers. Upon tasting the acrid paint, she snorted disgustedly.

"I know. I know," Ashitaka crooned, scratching her underneath her chin, "I don't like it much either."

It took Ashitaka an entire trough full of water to scrub off all the paint. By the time he was finished, the water was cloudy, and his skin felt raw and abused.

"Are you ready to go home?" Ashitaka asked as he prepared to mount. Yakul's ears pricked in interest.

Outside, the air was heavy and sweet with the cool, balmy breath of spring. It had begun to sprinkle lightly. Here and there, Iron Town's citizens were scurrying for cover.

"Ashitaka!"

A frantic-looking woman rushed through the street towards him. He reined Yakul in to a standstill.

"Ashitaka," she panted, "have you seen my children?"

Ashitaka recognized her as the mother of the Miwa twins. He shook his head apologetically. "I'm sorry. I haven't seen them."

The furrows of distress written across her face deepened. She bowed and thanked him before leaving hurriedly.

The gatekeepers were yelling, telling people to hurry inside. The rain was getting heavier by the moment. It pelted down mercilessly as a whip-crack of lightning hastened everyone's steps. Yakul trotted faithfully through the mud, eager to return home to dry, warm shelter. The deep, rolling boom of thunder echoed through the valley.

By the time Ashitaka arrived home, his bangs were matted to his forehead, and his clothing clung to him like a second skin. He dismounted and Yakul did the service of soaking him even more by shaking her long coat vigorously. She quietly entered her stall and he clicked the lock shut. As he rounded the corner of his house, the sound of voices drifted to him above the din of the rain.

He froze in mid-step, muscles tensing.

"We should go home."

"Don't be stupid. It's no use going anywhere with the weather like this."

They were children's voices. Bewildered, Ashitaka peeked around the corner. It took him a moment to register the three small masses huddled around his front door—one of which was holding an abused-looking stuffed cow.

"Aiko?" Ashitaka called out.

Aiko's head snapped up, her dirty face brightening the moment she recognized him. Then, just as quickly, her expression fell, and her features crumpled like paper. She held out her arms beseechingly as Ashitaka came forth. He scooped her up in his arms and held her as she burst into tears.

"Ashitaka!" she cried as if he was her eternal savior. She abandoned her doll on the ground, preferring to grab hold of his shirt and tuck her tear-streaked face under his chin.

"Shhh. It's alright," he said. With his free hand, he pried open the door. "Seiichi. Tomo. Get inside."

The twins shuffled silently through the threshold.

After the room was lit, Ashitaka gathered all the children together. They dripped water all over the floor and were gritty with dirt and mud.

"What happened to all of you?" Ashitaka asked incredulously.

Aiko pointed accusingly at her brothers. "Them! They are the stupidest boys in the entire world!" Ashitaka winced as she beat her tiny fists vehemently against his chest. "I went with them to the forest. _Even though we're not supposed to be there!_ But before that, they threw mud at me! And Mou Mou! And then they left me alone in the forest when I could have been _eaten_ by boars. Instead wolves showed up with Princess Mononoke and—"

"Princess Mononoke?" Ashitaka's voice broke through Aiko's rambling tirade. He cupped her chin and tilted her dirty face towards him. She was caught off guard by the flashing blue of his eyes. "Was it a girl around my age? With a crystal dagger around her neck?"

"Y-yes," Aiko stammered, her tears stymied momentarily. "She was going to take us home. But she brought us here because of the r-rain."

Ashitaka felt a pure, overwhelming tide of joy washed through him.

San was home.

Aiko curiously observed the lopsided grin that overtook his face. "Are you okay?" she inquired meekly.

Ashitaka blinked, snapping out of his reverie, and smiled brilliantly at her.

"Much better now, thanks to you." Aiko was befuddled as he pressed a grateful kiss against her temple. Setting her down, he brought the end of his sleeve up to wipe away her remaining tears.

"I'm very glad that you're safe." He hugged her tightly. When he released her, he shot her brothers a stern look. "I ran across your mother today. She was looking everywhere for you."

The twins' heads drooped. They fidgeted nervously.

"We're sorry," Seiichi said, scuffling his feet. "We didn't mean to make her worry, or to bother you." Tomo nodded beside him in silent agreement.

"You should save your apologies for your mother. You've caused her a lot of unnecessary trouble," Ashitaka reprimanded. He took note of how pitifully they were shivering in their wet clothes, and his voice gentled. "Come on. I'll get you cleaned up first and put you in some dry clothes. Mine are too big, but it looks like there's no other options."

"How will we get home?" Seiichi asked worriedly.

Ashitaka frowned as he raked his hand through his wet hair. He could hear the wind screaming and rattling at his door.

"I guess you all better spend the night," he sighed.

"Really?" Tomo perked up, suddenly vibrant with excitement.

Ashitaka smiled. "Yes, the rain sounds like it won't let up until morning. You better stay." He watched as the brothers exchanged jubilant expressions.

A loud growl rumbled from the pit of Aiko's stomach. She covered her mouth with her hands and blushed.

"Oops," she giggled.

Ashitaka grinned. "I guess after you change, you'll want dinner."

Tomo and Seiichi's bellies echoed in sentiment.

* * *

Ashitaka felt sorry that he didn't have much of a meal to offer. No matter, the children ate ravenously and were all sated and sleepy-eyed when they were finished. The twins stumbled over their long, borrowed leggings to the futon in Ashitaka's room, where they collapsed and were asleep in a matter of seconds. Aiko, however, needed to be thoroughly tucked in before she allowed him to leave her vicinity. 

Ashitaka's feet whispered across the bare floor as he walked over to his make-shift bed. He curled up on top of his blankets and lay there, wide-awake and still.

The scream of the wind had died down to a whistle, and the rain had muted to a soft, patter on the rooftop. Slowly, the noise of crickets, owls, and other night dwellers reemerged.

Ashitaka closed his eyes and listened.

Soon enough, it came—the low, mournful sound of a wolf's howl rising through the darkness. A breath's pause and another howl, more distant than the first, came in reply. Together, the two wolves wove a melancholy night-song. The silvery notes of their voices mended the frayed edges of Ashitaka's nerves. The tight ball of tension that had been building all winter suddenly unraveled. He began to slide easily into the realm of dreams.

The sound of the door jarred him back awake. Soft, scuffling footsteps approached.

He looked up and found Aiko rubbing her eyes blearily. She was clothed in one of his old shirts. It swamped her small frame, puddling around her ankles.

Ashitaka raised himself on his elbows. "What's the matter?"

"Tomo snores," Aiko said, muffling a yawn. "Can I sleep with you?"

Before he could reply, she was already crawling underneath the covers and wriggling in beside him. Ashitaka scooted aside to make room as she snuggled against his chest, leeching warmth. He rubbed her back in slow, soothing circles, and her eyelids began to droop.

"It's not raining anymore," she mumbled absently.

"Yes," Ashitaka confirmed, "I'll be able take your brothers and you home in the morning."

Outside, the howling deteriorated into a series of sharp yips and barks. The distance between the two voices had closed. The wolves had found each other; their calls were celebratory.

Ashitaka noticed Aiko suppress a small shiver beside him.

"There's nothing to be afraid of," he assured.

Aiko buried her face against Ashitaka's chest. "It sounds creepy. I wonder what they're saying."

"Probably good-bye," Ashitaka said pensively.

"Good-bye?" Aiko shifted and looked questioningly at Ashitaka.

"They're leaving soon," Ashitaka explained. "They have their own territories, other mountains to return to."

A new voice interrupted the duet. This one was different, higher and flatter than the previous two. It seemed unable to reach the range or the variety of tone the others possessed.

"That one is San," Ashitaka whispered.

"San? Princess Mononoke?" She listened again. "I thought it sounded kind of different."

It was a somber, strange melody, one human and two lupine voices echoing through the mountains.

"Doesn't it scare you, Ashitaka?" Aiko inquired curiously.

"No." Ashitaka thought about San's light, lilting voice. He ached to hear her speak again.

"You're not scared of anything," Aiko stated rather huffily.

Ashitaka smiled. "You'd be surprised. It's just when I hear the wolves are like this at night, it reminds me that San is somewhere nearby."

"She was rather nice," Aiko admitted sleepily, her eyes drifting shut.

Ashitaka was almost sure that she had been lulled to sleep until he heard her voice chirp up once more.

"Ashitaka, is San the reason why you can't marry me?"

When Aiko finally did fall asleep, it was with her ear pressed against Ashitaka's chest, listening to the deep resounding echoes of his laughter.

* * *

"Aiko!" Tomo screamed. 

Seiichi ran hard, feeling as if his heart would burst with the blood pumping through his body. His brother sprinted alongside him. Branches whipped at their bare faces and limbs as they hurtled through the forest undergrowth. As they neared the clearing, they screeched to a halt.

"Aiko!" Tomo's voice echoed across the empty field. A flock of birds nestled in the trees became unsettled and took to the air.

No answer.

Seiichi cupped his hands together. "Aiko!" he called. "Where are you?"

"This isn't funny!" Tomo added, unable to keep his voice from cracking with panic.

They approached the tree where they had left her. No one was there.

Tomo spotted a dark, irregular lump among the tangle of roots. Tenderly, he picked up the mud-caked object and turned it over in his hands.

It was Mou Mou.

"She'd never leave without him," Seiichi said, fighting the lump of fear surging in his throat, "She always said that Mou Mou gets lonely without her."

Nearby, Seiichi spotted a flurry of track-marks embedded in the soft earth. He recognized his own and Tomo's. Mixed among them were Aiko's smaller, daintier footsteps. They led away from the spot, splattered and sloppy as if she had been running. Then the impressions became clearer as she slowed, and her footprints joined the track-marks of something else.

"Tomo," Seiichi whispered, "Look over here."

He traced a finger over the outer edge of the print. There were four digits, each as big as his fist, fanned out around a deep indentation in the middle.

It was a paw print.

Seiichi swallowed dryly. "Do you remember the stories that Dad used to tell us? The ones about Mononoke and how she could change people into animals?"

"We never believed that," Tomo replied shakily.

Seiichi stared at the spot where Aiko's footprints melted into nothingness.

"Tomo," Seiichi said quietly, "I'm not so sure anymore."

Tomo hugged the ratty toy fiercely to his chest and trembled.

"No, no, no, no, no," he whispered, rocking back and forth. He choked out a muffled, broken sob. "It's all my fault. What if we can't find her? What if—"

"Shhh!" Seiichi clapped a hand over his brother's mouth. "Did you hear that?"

They stilled. A raven cawed. The wind whistled through the trees. Seiichi could hear his own rattled breathing and the rabbit-quick beats of his heart.

There was a rustle, leaves and branches being pushed aside by something moving through the forest. Something big.

"It's coming back," Seiichi murmured, "Whatever it is."

He dragged Tomo to his feet and urged him up. They ran for the clearing. The sharp snap of twigs cracked at their heel like bullets.

They barely broke a few yards before they were eclipsed by an immense shadoe—something huge sailing over their heads. The ground shook as hundreds of pounds of lithe, sinewy muscle made impact with the earth. Tomo and Seiichi screamed as they were knocked over. When they recollected their senses, they found themselves being scrutinized by a pair of impassive, golden eyes.

Wolf eyes.

Seiichi could feel his brother's hand quivering between his own, the nails digging crescent shapes into his palm.

At the end of the long, white muzzle, the black nose crinkled, as if in distaste.

"_You stink of fear."_

Seiichi couldn't decipher if it was a voice or a growl. The sound reached into the marrow of his bones and rattled up his spine.

The wolf placed one massive paw forward. And then another. Its steps formed small craters in the earth, and its mouth was held slightly ajar, displaying two rows of pointed, yellowed teeth. Hooked on one of the lower fangs was a scrap of fabric, its light color stark against black gums.

It was the same color Aiko had been wearing.

A wave of dread hit Seiichi. His gut twisted in fear.

Tomo must have come to the same realization, for suddenly, he snatched up a nearby stick and brandished it in a sword-like fashion.

"It was you!" he bellowed, "You took our sister! You monster!" He jabbed the stick forward, at one of the wolf's golden eyes.

It didn't go very far. With a deft snap of its jaws, the wolf shattered their only defense into a series of splinters. Seiichi wondered if his bones would make a similar crunch.

Irritated, the wolf emitted a rumbling snarl and opened up its cavernous maw.

Seiichi reached out for his brother's hand. It was clammy with sweat. They held on tightly to each other, huddled pitifully against their inevitable death.

"Wait! Stop!"

Puzzled at why he wasn't dead, Seiichi cracked open an eye. To his utter confusion and amazement, his sister stepped out of the woods. Her clothes were a little more tattered and her face streaked heavily mud. Other than that, she was whole, healthy, and unmistakably alive.

"A-Aiko?" Tomo stammered.

Aiko tread over to the wolf and laid her tiny hand against its muzzle, stroking the downy fur. The snarls died down, fading into a low, rolling growl. Her brothers watched dumbstruck as the wolf's tail began to whip back and forth. Its pink tongue lolled out of its mouth as it panted. Aiko spoke soothingly to the wolf, as if it was nothing more than a giant puppy.

"What's going on?" Tomo demanded. "What happened? Aiko, get away from that thing!"

The wolf snarled. Tomo cringed and took a hasty step backwards.

Aiko gave her brother an affronted look. "Don't be so rude," she admonished.

"Rude?" Tomo blurted, the color rising in his cheeks. "Aiko, you scared us to death! We thought you had gotten killed!"

"Then maybe you shouldn't have left me!" Aiko shot back saucily. "I might as well have been if she hadn't found me."

"She?" Seiichi echoed, confused. "Who are you talking about?"

"Me."

The twins jumped at the voice, their eyes darting toward the line of trees that guarded the forest depths.

Like smoke, another enormous white wolf melted out of the shadows. Only this one carried a figure astride.

Seiichi's breath caught in his throat.

He remembered the rainy days spent gathered with his siblings before the hearth. He remembered the flames causing shadows to lick their upturned faces as their father's slow, steady voice wove together tales of nightmare and fantasy. Of gods and wolves and a woman who was somehow in between.

Seiichi took in the sight of the figure before him—a fairy tale come to life—and remembered with startling clarity everything he had been told.

The painted mask.

"_Beneath it her eyes are the color of a night without stars. It's because she's lost her soul to the wolf-gods of the mountain. A single glance is enough to drain your spirit from your body, leaving behind nothing but a dried husk—neither living nor dead."_

The white, flowing headdress.

"_A pack stole her from her parents when she was still in the cradle. When she grew old enough, she ripped apart the alpha with her bare hands. She wears his skin now as a reminder of her dominion over the forest."_

The necklace of fangs.

"_When children stray too close to the forest, she lures them in and peels away their soul with her magic. She wears one fang for every child's soul she steals and turns into a wolf."_

The crystal dagger.

"_It belonged to a man once. She loved him, but when he refused her, she tore open his chest and ate his beating heart."_

"Princess Mononoke," Tomo whispered reverently.

Seiichi's hand shot out and gripped his brother's arm. He yanked them downwards until their noses scraped the earth.

"Princess Mononoke, we beg most humbly for your pardon. Forgive us for trespassing onto your forest. If you let us take our sister and go, we promise never ever to return." The words issued from Seiichi's lips in a single, rushed breath.

Silence hung thick and palpable in the air. Then the quiet was disrupted by a strange sound. The wolves were emitting a husky, deep-throated chuffing sound. As if they were laughing.

Seiichi's eyes darted upwards just as Mononoke reached up and pushed back her mask.

To Seiichi's surprise, he was not struck dead upon the sight of her face. There were no boils, warts, no hooked nose or other monstrous, grotesques features to behold. Instead, there was the face of a young woman, one unlike any he had ever seen before.

He couldn't place it at first, what it was about her that struck him as so eerie, so different.

She was beautiful, something he recognized instinctually. However, the term was too loose, too ill-fitted for what he saw. Beautiful was a weak word, like saying a river was wet or that fire was hot. Her features were comely enough—a dainty nose, thin, straight brows, a sweet, heart-shaped face. The bright triangles of paint across her cheeks and forehead withstanding, she looked almost normal. However, at the same time, she completely eluded any semblance of normalcy. There was something else, something primitive, raw, and elemental in her face.

Seiichi eyes flickered upward and met her gaze. Realization swept over him.

Her eyes were blue, but a cold blue, like the color lay trapped beneath a thick filament of ice. They were the feral grey-blue of a river, powerful and untamed. Her stare was wide, naked, penetrating; it unnerved him how deeply and unabashedly she probed him.

Like an animal. Like a wolf.

"Wow," Tomo breathed, "You're really pretty,"

Seiichi smacked his brother. "Shut up!" he hissed.

When he looked back up, Mononoke was smiling faintly. It softened her eyes considerably and made Seiichi's stomach tie itself into nervous knots. He felt faint as she deftly dismounted and approached.

"Get up." Her voice was gentle but brusque.

The twins scrambled to their feet.

"You don't have to act so frightened." She quirked an eyebrow in amusement. "No one is going to get eaten."

"S-so, you're not going to turn us into w-wolves?" Tomo stuttered.

Princess Mononoke cocked head in a distinctly dog-like fashion, a smile broadening across her features. "I don't think you two would make very good wolves."

"They don't make very good brothers either," Aiko informed.

"Is that so?" Mononoke pursed her lips sympathetically.

"Aiko!" Seiichi hissed warningly. His sister stuck her tongue at him.

"You three should head home," Mononoke advised, "There's a storm coming in."

As she spoke, a fat rain drop splattered against Seiichi's forehead. He noted with distress that it was beginning to sprinkle lightly.

"Tsume," Princess Mononoke called softly.

The wolf that had terrorized the twins earlier stepped forward. Its tail caught Seiichi in the face as it strode by and stopped in front of Mononoke.

"We should take these children home," she crooned, scratching his chin affectionately.

"_Ugh."_ Tsume gave Tomo a cursory sniff and snorted disgustedly. _"They smell."_

"They're just pups," she remarked. "They're human. They can't help it."

Tsume made a sound that resembled a resigned groan and lowered himself to the ground.

"You." With a start, Seiichi realized that Mononoke was addressing him. "You'll ride with me. Tsume will carry your brother and sister."

Aiko nodded and grabbed a rather stunned Tomo's hand, leading him over to where Tsume waited. The wolf winced as Aiko tugged rather sharply on a pointed ear. They both clambered on.

The other wolf sidled up next to Seiichi, startling him. He was obedient as Mononoke ushered him aboard, seating herself behind and hooking an arm securely around his waist. Seiichi fought to temper the blush coloring his face.

"Hang on," she cautioned as underneath them, the wolf rose to its feet. The other rose as well.

A bolt of lightning tore across the sky. The crack of thunder was quick to follow.

"If the rain gets too heavy, I'll have to drop you off at a friend's house," Mononoke told Seiichi, "He'll take care of you."

"Oh. Do you mean Ashitaka?" Seiichi asked shyly.

His stomach flip-flopped, and the tips of his ear turned pink as Mononoke's face lit up with the brightest smile he'd ever seen.

"Yes, Ashitaka is a good friend of mine," she replied softly.

For some reason, she touched the crystal dagger at her breast. Even in the dim light, it glittered between her fingers.

Another flash of lightning streaked through the sky.

She shook her head, the flat disk-like earrings framing her face making an eerie, musical sound.

"Let's go."

Without another moment's pause, the wolves lurched forward.


End file.
